Crisis and Victory - a Baha’i Perspective

by Susan Gammage

“Remember My days during thy days, and My distress and banishment in this remote prison . . .” (Bahá’u'lláh)

When I was in the deepest despair, remembering traumatic events of my childhood, I came across this quote, which helped to lift me out of my “self”.  I was feeling a lot of “poor me” and “why did this have to happen to me”, and then I had to stop and remember Bahá’u'lláh’s days.

Bahá’u'lláh was born into a wealthy family and was expected to follow his father into an important position in the government of Persia (Iran).  He didn’t want the position or the power.  Instead He wanted to dedicate Himself to helping the oppressed, sick and poor and to champion the cause of justice.

As a result, his life included a series of imprisonments, and banishments.  At one point He was imprisoned for four months in an underground reservoir for a public bath, with its only outlet a single passage down three steep flights of stone steps. He sat with his feet in stocks and a 100-pound iron chain around his neck.  He and His fellow prisoners (150 thieves, murders and highwaymen) huddled in their own bodily wastes, languishing in the pit’s inky gloom, subterranean cold and vermin and stench-ridden atmosphere.

When he was freed from prison, He and His family were banished to Bagdad (Iraq), a 3 month journey on foot over the mountains in the middle of winter without enough food.

“The throat Thou didst accustom to the touch of silk Thou hast, in the end, clasped with strong chains, and the body Thou didst ease with brocades and velvets Thou hast at last subjected to the abasement of a dungeon. Thy decree hath shackled Me with unnumbered fetters, and cast about My neck chains that none can sunder . . . How many the nights during which the weight of chains and fetters allowed Me no rest, and how numerous the days during which peace and tranquility were denied Me . . . Both bread and water . . . they have, for a time, forbidden unto this servant . . . and Thy behest summoned this servant to depart out of Persia, accompanied by a number of frail-bodied men and children of tender age, at this time when the cold is so intense that one cannot even speak, and ice and snow so abundant that it is impossible to move”.  (Shoghi Effendi, God Passes By, p. 109)

He stayed in Bagdad for 7 years, and then was banished again to Constantinople (Turkey), where he stayed for four months, and then was exiled again to Adrianople (Turkey).  Again it was in winter and they didn’t have the proper clothes to protect them from the harsh weather.  In order to drink, they had to light a fire to thaw ice from springs along the way.  He stayed there for four and a half years and then was banished to the prison city of ‘Akká (Israel), to which the worst criminals were sent.  He remained there for the rest of His life (24 years).

He was discredited by His uncle, poisoned by his jealous half-brother and witnessed the death of His son.  He was betrayed by people He trusted, stoned, and isolated from the Believers.  For a time, to protect the Faith from the efforts of His half-brother, He lived as a hermit.  He was the victim of ignorance, injustice, cruelty and fanaticism.

But every crisis was followed by victory, and this, I believe, is what is important to remember.

Although my repressed memories included all the positive and neutral memories too, once they came back I was able to see that like Bahá’u'lláh, there were times in my life that were peaceful, and activities that weren’t abusive.  From anger I learned to find my voice and take action.  From poverty I was protected from materialism and learned to rely on God.  From estrangement I gained knowledge of myself, and through it, knowledge of God. From being silenced, I was protected from backbiting and gossip.

So when you’re feeling in the pit of despair, I urge you to remember not only the negative things that happened to you, and to Bahá’u'lláh, but to remember the victories that came from them as well.

What are your experiences with crisis and victory?  Post your comments here.

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Self-Awareness - a Baha’i Perspective

by Susan Gammage

“Turn thy sight unto thyself, that thou mayest find Me standing within thee, mighty, powerful and self-subsisting”.

I love this quote!  For years following my abuse, I was so resistant to looking inside.  I’d lived through it once when I was a child, and again in therapy.  I knew there was a lot more stuff to clean out and I wanted no part of it.  But where I wasn’t willing to “turn my sight unto myself” to find more memories, I could “turn my sight unto myself” to find God!  That was a whole lot better than finding more abuse, with all its attendant negative emotions!

When I went there, it’s amazing what was released . . . all the neutral and positive memories!  A flood of them!  They came back all at once, and it helped me to see that as awful as my childhood was, there was something I could build on:  my relationship with God.   And I am grateful!

What happens when you turn your sight to yourself?  Post your comments here.

Click here for more quotes like these.

Protection – a Bahá’í Perspective

by Susan Gammage

If you seek immunity from the sway of the forces of the contingent world, hang the Most Great Name in your dwelling, wear the ring of the Most Great Name on your finger, place the picture of ‘Abdul-Bahá in your home and always recite the prayers that I have written; then you will behold the marvelous effect they produce.

When I first disclosed my abuse in therapy and then to my perpetrators, I was feeling very vulnerable.  Would I be killed?  I’d believed that this would be the outcome of giving voice to my experience, all of my life, which is what had kept me silenced for so long, even to myself.  Therefore, I was happy when I discovered this morning’s quote by ‘Abdul-Bahá.  It was something practical I could immediately implement.

I went from looking over my shoulders and not wanting to leave home, to trusting that I would be protected from any recriminations.  And I was!  It was a heady experience!

Later, once my life had stabilized and I was experiencing triggers at work with abusive bosses, I would read that quote again, and realize I was again being protected.  I had choices this time, where I did not as a child.

Even later, when I realized the impact of materialism on my life, and longed for a simpler lifestyle, this quote reminded me that by living on a limited income, I was being protected from the worst of it.

I love discovering deeper layers of meaning in quotes as I grow in faith!

Click here to see where you can find more quotes like these.

A Story about Gossip – A Bahá’í Approach

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

The Bahá’í Writings teach:

Backbiting quencheth the light of the heart, and extinguisheth the life of the soul. (Baha’u'llah, Gleanings from the Writings of Baha’u'llah, p. 265)

In a Bahá’í-inspired life coaching call tonight, we had a long talk about the effects of gossip and backbiting in a community, and what my client could do to help people understand its effects.  I thought of this story – one of my son’s favorites, and mine too.  Hope you find it helpful.

A woman repeated a bit of gossip about a neighbor. Within a few days the whole community knew the story. The person it concerned was deeply hurt and offended. Later the woman responsible for spreading the rumor learned that it was completely untrue. She was very sorry and went to a wise old sage to find out what she could do to repair the damage.

“Go to the marketplace,” he said, “and purchase a chicken, and have it killed. Then on your way home, pluck its feathers and drop them one by one along the road.”

Although surprised by this advice, the woman did what she was told.  The next day the wise man said, “Now go and collect all those feathers you dropped yesterday and bring them back to me.

” The woman followed the same road, but to her dismay, the wind had blown the feathers all away. After searching for hours, she returned with only three in her hand. “You see,” said the old sage, “it’s easy to drop them, but it’s impossible to get them back.

So it is with gossip. It doesn’t take much to spread a rumor, but
once you do, you can never completely undo the wrong.”

Author Unknown
http://www.olivebranch.com/thoughts/gossip.htm

What have been your experiences with gossip and backbiting?  Post your comments here:

How to Let Go of the Past and Move Forward in Your Life - A Bahai Perspective

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

Detachment – Forgiveness – Faith – Trust – Hope

All spiritual principles encouraged in the Bahá’í Faith as well as other religions, but how do we apply them to painful situations that continue to plague our lives?

In order to live a full and complete life, we must learn how to let go of past failures and disappointments and not carry them with us into our future.

Hanging on to pain, bitterness and disappointment from a past conflict is a heavy burden. It affects your moods, attitudes, relationships, job and all aspects of your life. Negativity eats away at your self-esteem and destroys any possibility of a life free from pain.

Fortunately, there’s a light at the end of the tunnel! Your future doesn’t have to be a repetition of your past. You don’t need to be destined to a life of pain, regardless of what you’ve already been through. You can lay down your burdens. It’s okay for you to be free. In fact, you deserve it!

These six steps will help you move forward and find the freedom you need to begin living a fuller, more enjoyable life, regardless of what lies in your past:

1. Talk about it. Discuss your past pain, fear, disappointment or trauma with a trusted friend or family member. Fully express the feelings associated with the situation: cry, scream, or do whatever you need to do to release the bottled up emotions in a safe way.

Until you really talk about the feelings connected to your past, you may not be able to move past them. Once you’ve spoken the words, release them from your mind forever. As hard as it may be, it’s the only way to free yourself from your past.

…let us turn our hearts away from the world of matter and live in the spiritual world! It alone can give us freedom!    (‘Abdu’l-Bahá, Paris Talks, p. 110)

2. Use a journal. Writing in a journal is an excellent way to pour out your pain. A journal offers the safety of knowing your words are just for you and won’t be read by anyone else. Don’t worry about spelling, grammar, or even if the words follow a logical progression, simply write from the heart.

Physically writing your thoughts and feelings can release your emotions so you can move past them.

And as you come to the end of your writing, reflect on the good that came out of the event.

To look always at the good and not at the bad. If a man has ten good qualities and one bad one, to look at the ten and forget the one. And if a man has ten bad qualities and one good one, to look at the one and forget the ten.  (Dr. J.E. Esselmont, Bahá’u’lláh and the New Era, p. 83)

3. Seek forgiveness. Many people misunderstand the meaning of forgiveness. Forgiveness doesn’t mean what happened to you is unimportant or you’re saying it’s “okay.” In fact, forgiveness isn’t about the other person at all.

Forgiveness simply means that you’ve made the choice to let go of the desire to exact revenge and punishment, and you’ve found closure within your heart and soul.

Forgiveness releases you from the burden of carrying the pain any longer. By choosing to forgive, you can stop thinking about the past so it won’t control your future.

The Bahá’í Writings tell us:

You are urged to strive to develop for¬giveness in your heart . . . and to attain a level of insight which sees them as captives of their lower nature, whose actions can only lead them deeper into unhappiness and separation from God. By this means, you can liberate yourself from the anger to which you refer in your letter. (Universal House of Justice to an individual, Dec. 2, 1985)

4. Seek professional guidance. You can choose to get help from a life coach or therapist.  The people closest to us aren’t always the best choice to help us work through our pain. It may be difficult for us to fully open up about our deepest pain or it may be hard for them to step back far enough to help us through it.

Seeking guidance from a professional gives us the safety of relative anonymity, which can make it easier to share our problems. Often a coach or counselor can help us see a new point of view, which can help us move forward.  If you need the help of a life coach, Susan provides the first 30 minutes at no cost to you.  Click here to email her for more information.

5. Use alternative therapies. There are many techniques you can use to help change your mindset, which can be instrumental in leaving the past behind.

One method, known as EFT or Emotional Freedom Technique, uses the principles of acupuncture (without the needles!) to help you take the “charge” out of your feelings. EFT is done by tapping with your fingertips on the meridian points in the upper part of your body.

The tapping sequence, combined with verbally expressing your feelings, helps break up the blockage of energy caused by the negative feelings, allowing you to release them.  For more information, do a Google search – there are lots of good articles on EFT out there.

6.  Read the Bahá’í Writings, morning and night.  Not only is it a requirement, it serves a practical function as well.  As we see in the Bahá’í Writings:

Peruse My verses with joy and radiance. Verily they will attract you unto God and will enable you to detach yourselves from all save this resplendent Tablet.  (Bahá’u'lláh, The Compilation of Compilations, vol. I, p. 188)

Hanging onto past negativity isn’t necessary. No matter what your history contains, you can learn to release it and move forward into a life filled with contentment and joy. Find a method that works for you and begin, today, to let go of the past and move into the life you deserve!

My BNASAA Story

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

The Bahá’í Network on AIDS, Sexuality, Addictions and Abuse (BNASAA) is holding its 20th anniversary celebrations on November 6-8, 2009 at Green Acre Bahá’í School.  They were asking for “transformation stories” in order to capture the impact of the BNASAA process in the last 20 years.  What follows is my story.

I didn’t go to the first BNASAA conference.  I could have.  I saw the ad in Bahá’í Canada and even called Marjorie for more information.  The first man I ever loved had AIDS at the time, and he died in December 1989, a year after his diagnosis.  Although I was married to somebody else, I helped him die that year.  So it would have made sense to go, but I thought I was strong enough on my own and didn’t need a group.  How wrong I was.

My marriage ended shortly after and a year and a half into my year of patience, I fell in love with a woman.  I’d read all the Writings.  I knew it was wrong.  I just couldn’t make it stop – so when BNASAA held its second conference on homosexuality, at Green Acre, I went.  I knew that the purpose wasn’t to challenge the law, but I hoped I’d meet other gay Bahá’ís who’d found a loophole that would make it all right.  I really thought we’d talk about being gay and about being Bahá’í, but informally we talked about using sex as an addiction (a new concept for me), and formally we heard about being created noble and then abasing ourselves.  It all made sense – and I became a BNASAA groupie.

Since BNASAA didn’t have the loopholes I was looking for, I wrote to the House of Justice – looking for their approval and I got it.  They told me it was OK to love someone of the same sex, and they told me I was living in a society that sexualized everything, so it was no wonder that so many people confused love and sex.  It was hard to hear that sex belonged to a married heterosexual couple, and that there was no way for this law to change, but the letter was full of love and although I didn’t like it, I knew that this Faith was bigger than my likes and dislikes, so with the help of 2 Local Spiritual Assemblies I left the relationship, willing to align with the will of God.

It wasn’t easy.  We owned a house together and I had to sell my interest, losing my entire investment in the process.  The stress precipitated a major depressive episode and I wasn’t able to work.  I went onto long term disability and stayed there for many years.  I lost the remainder of my life savings and moved into a one room shack in the woods with my 8 year old son, where we lived for 2 years.

Of course, the depression wasn’t all because of my decision to leave.  The third BNASAA conference focused on Addictions, but what everyone wanted to talk about was the abuse that fed into the addictions.  I’d been working through my abuse issues for several years, which were triggered by Randy’s diagnosis of AIDS, and made worse with every loss.  This series of losses was just the final straw.

The BNASAA conferences raised more questions than answers, and I often left, writing more letters to the House asking for clarity and sharing their answers with each subsequent conference.

I never would have been able to attend the BNASAA conferences without the generous subsidies from the scholarship fund, so if you are one of the angels who paid my way over the years, please know that I am eternally grateful.

Each conference left me more determined than ever to align with the teachings of the Bahá’í Faith.  As instructed, I read the Writings morning and night, and almost always found a quote that gave me insights into my struggle.  I collected the quotes, and in 1996 was invited to share them with a conference at LouHelen.  Up till that point, they were all in a file drawer, and I didn’t know what I had till I grouped them together, and a book was born.

I didn’t like telling my story and being the centre of attention (my abusers told me that if I talked about what happened to me, I would be killed, and since I’d watched it happen to others, I knew it to be true), and at several conferences, I was unable to function and needed the support of the on-call therapist.

I owe another debt of gratitude to Pat Romano McGraw, who understood triggers and dissociative disorders and post traumatic stress and was able to get me though some tough situations.

It was hard having all these writings at my disposal, and not living up to them.  As it says in the Tablet of Ahmad:  “the wisdom of every command shall be tested” and I was testing most of them!  I was back into another relationship, unable to live up to the standards of the Faith, about to become a household name when the book came out, and I wasn’t doing what it said to do.  All of the quotes were nothing but “shoulds” and I was sinking under the weight.

But I kept going to the conferences and I kept trying to bring my life into alignment with the Writings, and I guess it must have had some effect, because at the last conference, I met some people I hadn’t seen for several years, and they called me a poster child for BNASAA transformation, and I am grateful for this yardstick by which to measure my progress.  I think what they saw was my smile, and my willingness to make eye-contact, two things I hadn’t done at the earlier conferences.

I still have a long way to go.  I still struggle with anxiety and depression, and still live under a cloud of despair from time to time, but I do have hope, and most days, I can see light at the end of the tunnel.

At the beginning of the journey I wanted to talk to others who’d made it through, and I couldn’t find anyone.  I promised that if I made it through, I’d show others it’s possible.  So now the book is out in the world (Abuse and Violence:  Reasons and Remedies, Bahá’í Publishing Trust India, 2009), taking on a life of its own, and I’ve started a Bahá’í-inspired life coaching practice, with a strong presence on the web, sharing the quotes with others and helping people apply the Writings to their everyday life situations.

It was a real step, breaking the silence imposed on me by my abusers, putting my story out there on the internet.  You can find it if you look deeply enough, at www.susangammage.com

I know these stories are meant to be anonymous, but sharing my story publically is part of my healing.

I’m proud to be affiliated with BNASAA and 10% of the royalties from the book are going back into the scholarship fund.  Thank you God, for BNASAA and all the selfless steadfast sacrifices of its organizers!  May we have 20 more good years, and 20 more after that.  The world is waiting!  Yá Bahá’u’l-Abhá!

Have you ever been to a BNASAA conference?  Share your experiences here:

Abuse and Violence - A Baha’i Perspective

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

I’m happy to announce the release of my new book called:  Abuse and Violence:  Reasons and Remedies.  It’s a compilation from the Bahá’í Writings and offers many quotes not found in other sources.  For more information, please go to:  http://bahailifecoach.com/publications#post-1

According to the United Nations one in three women will experience violence during her lifetime and one in six men will be abused.  The Bahá’í Writings teach:  “Among the signs of moral downfall in the declining social order are the high incidence of violence within the family, the increase in degrading and cruel treatment of spouses and children, and the spread of sexual abuse. It is essential that the members of the community of the Greatest Name take the utmost care not to be drawn into acceptance of such practices because of their prevalence. They must be ever mindful of their obligation to exemplify a new way of life distinguished by its respect for the dignity and rights of all people, by its exalted moral tone, and by its freedom from oppression and from all forms of abuse.”

The struggle to end violence on this planet is a battle on four levels – emotional, intellectual, spiritual, physical.  It requires every bit of our strength, our courage, our fierceness.  It means speaking out when everyone says to be quiet.  It means going the distance to hold perpetrators accountable for their actions, even when we know that punishment does not make abusive people behave better.  It means honoring the truth even if it means losing family, country and friends.  It means developing the spiritual muscle to enter and survive the grief that violence brings and, in that dangerous space of stunned unknowing, inviting the deeper wisdom.

The process of healing from violence is long and happens in stages.

Those of us who have been abused have a responsibility to turn something horrible into something positive, by sharing our stories.   We have to experience our rage, depression and desire for revenge and transform them through grieving and teaching and service.

In every community there are humble activist working every day, to undo suffering.  They sit by hospital beds, pass new laws, write boring proposals, beg for money, open safe houses, demonstrate and hold vigils in the streets.  We have not given up hope, but we are exhausted.  Yet with everything, we still laugh, work and continue to go on.  Despite it all, we still have the biggest, most sincere smile on our faces and demonstrate to others the enormous strength of the human spirit.  We know that compassion is the deepest form of memory.

If we were to hate the perpetrators, the perpetrators would have won.

Inequality is the primary form of violence.  Whether we were molested as children, raped or beaten in North America, stoned and publicly shamed in Pakistan, abducted and disappeared in Chile, suffered female genital mutilation in Kenya, subjected to systematic and widespread gang rape in Bosnia, beaten to death for not wearing a veil in Afghanistan, sold into sexual slavery in Northern Africa, burned with acid in Pakistan, sex-selective abortions and infanticide in China, dowry-related deaths and honor killings in India, beaten for refusing to have sex with a husband in Egypt,  honor killings in Bangladesh and women slowly being made extinct through gender genocide and war in Afghanistan and Iraq . . . the list goes on and on.

Every woman’s story is my story too.  I am a Canadian, I am a Bahá’í.  I am a citizen of the World.  I embrace the experience of women all over the world and I help them realize that we are one, that united we can face anything.  For more information, please go to:  http://bahailifecoach.com/publications#post-1

Abuse and Violence: Reasons and Remedies

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

Through this process I have learned several things:

• I can feel worthless AND know that I was created noble. God’s love for me remains unchanged, despite what I have done or what was done to me.
• The abuse was abasing AND it is me who continues to keep it in that light. It is my job to rise above it, and accomplish that for which I was creates.
• The abuse was awful AND there’s a context to put it in (See the sections on the Purpose of Life and the Role of Suffering and Tests).
• I can be in extreme pain as a result of my experiences AND I don’t have to stay trapped there. I can focus my attention away from the pain and towards acquiring virtues.
• I can use a therapist AND when I don’t have the money or my appointment is another week away, I can use the Divine Physician who is always available to me.
• I can be confused by feelings of anger, shame and low self esteem AND I can read about the role models of our faith: the heroes and martyrs of the Cause and of course, ‘Abdu’l-Bahá, the Perfect Exemplar.
• The abusers are criminals and accountable for their actions AND my job is to focus on my own spiritual growth and leave the accountability to God.
• There is no us/them. Bahá’u'lláh tells us we are all sinners. The nature of our sins may vary from person to person (as do our tests), but no one is exempt, therefore there is no one to blame. I recommend the chapter on “Breaking the Cycle” because it has so many practical, do-able suggestions for the transformation of our characters.In my life coaching practice, survivors of sexual abuse, parents estranged from their children over accusations of abuse, and other family members have repeatedly asked me to publish a resource that would help them resolve lives damaged by abuse. I’ve turned the principles I’ve studied, taught and lived for more than 20 years into this practical and inspiring guide that will help you get from where you are to where you want to be. Get ready to transform!

In Abuse and Violence: Reasons and Remedies, you will learn:

Chapter 1 - The Nature of the Problem

• The Purpose of Life
• Fate and Predestination
• Role of Tests and Difficulties
• The Causes

Chapter 2 – Types of Abuse

Chapter 3 – The Effects on the Victim and Consequences for the Abuser

Chapter 4 – The Remedies

Chapter 5 – Breaking the Cycle of Violence and Abuse

Chapter 6 – Living a Bahá’í Life

Chapter 7- The Role of Individuals, Families and Institutions

The Principles Always Work… If You Work the Principles

Taken together and practiced every day, these principles WILL transform your life beyond your wildest dreams!

For more information, please go to:  http://bahailifecoach.com/main-menu/books-publications#post-1

“A great resource for those involved in counseling as well as a great reference for quotations that have a specific slant towards suffering and the healing process”

How to Set Limits for Children on Sex and Violence in a Bahá’í Home

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

One of my life coaching clients asked “what Bahá’í Writings and principles can we use to put limits on violence? (ie how can we encourage enterprise, adventure, loyalty, courage, challenge and team-work without accepting violence in toys, TV and behaviour?

The topic of violence is near and dear to my heart. When my son was young, it was a lot easier: I simply didn’t allow violent toys into the house. On invitations to birthday parties, I always wrote: “Violence-free toys would be appreciated”, and I never had anyone go against this request.

I didn’t have time to monitor the TV or money for the better cable stations, so TV was simply not used, except for the occasional movie (though I did have the entire collection of M*A*S*H, which I used to teach him to be anti-war!)

Fortunately, he wasn’t interested in competitive sports (nor were they encouraged). Instead we cultivated an interest in karate, swimming, skiing, biking, hiking snow-boarding and skateboarding.

When friends came over and were interested in violent activities, I would simply say, “this is a violence-free house”. I seldom had to repeat it twice, and was always astonished that the children understood what this meant and were able to adjust their behaviour accordingly.

When my son was a pre-teen, he was constantly exposed to violent computer games and music. Fortunately we didn’t have much money, so weren’t able to buy these things. When they crept into the house, though, we’d talk about them. Sometimes he disagreed with my definitions of what is violent, and he often didn’t understand why I reacted so strongly to it. Because we consulted, we both felt heard and when I really couldn’t stand another song with violence or sex, he was OK with turning the radio off. I learned that I can’t ban everything; I had to learn moderation and tolerance.

My favorite line was: “it’s not my law, it’s the law of God”, or “what would ‘Abdul-Bahá think?” or “you don’t have to like it, you just have to do it”.

We used to read personal accounts of people’s experiences with the Central Figures of the Bahá’í Faith and it helped us to understand the context in which decisions were made. When he could see the human side of the Central Figures, he had role models to look up to.

How do you set limits on violence and sex in your home? Post your comments here:

BNASAA (BAHÁ’Í NETWORK ON AIDS, SEXUALITY, ADDICTIONS AND ABUSE) CONFERENCE ANNOUNCED

by Susan Gammage, Baha'i Life Coach

You are invited to attend this year’s Conference of the Bahá’í Network on AIDS, Sexuality, Addictions and Abuse at LouHelen Bahá’í School in Davison, Michegan (USA).This year’s annual Conference of the Bahá’í Network on AIDS, Sexuality, Addictions and Abuse (BNASAA) will be held starting Thursday Evening, October 30 through noon Sunday, November 2, 2008.

For 20 years, BNASAA has provided a safe environment for Bahá’ís to experience healing and growth on personally sensitive issues. The power of the Word of Bahá’u’lláh and the protection of the Covenant are the basis and provide the transformative nature of all BNASAA activities.This year’s conference theme is: “Building a Safe Community – There’s More Work to Do”The Conference theme seeks to address experiences that some individuals have had in the Bahá’í Community. Well intentioned individuals can be very hurtful by seeming to dismiss the experiences and concerns of Bahá’ís who have experienced various kinds of afflictions, especially those arising out of abuse, alcohol, drug use or sexual orientation.

BNASAA provides a safe and protected environment where those experiences and concerns can be shared, and viewed in light of the Writings of Bahá’u’lláh and the Covenant.The program will include presentations on Making Connections, Seeking the Wisdom of the Heart, Transforming your Devotional Practice, Suffering, Forgiveness and Justice, as well as a keynote speaker and smaller group workshops that address specific areas of concern: Addictions, AIDS, Abuse, Sexuality and Sexual Orientation. A representative of the Continental Board of Counselors will be there to provide individual assistance.

Because of the sensitive nature of the Conference, and in order to safeguard the sense of safety and love for both the individual as well as the group, it is important that attendees plan to be there for the entirety of the conference — arriving Thursday evening and committing to staying through the entire weekend.

One of the primary purposes of the Conference is to create a sense of community and safety; people coming and going throughout the weekend is disruptive to that purpose. If for any reason an attendee cannot be there for the whole conference from opening night to the Closing Circle on Sunday, they must discuss this with a member of the planning committee prior to the Conference.

Registration for the Conference can be made by contacting LouHelen at 1-800-894-9716 or 810-653-5033. Information is available online at http://www.louhelen.org/.

General information about BNASAA can be found at the BNASAA website: http://www.bnasaa.org/. BNASAA is a committee of the National Spiritual Assembly of the Bahá’ís of Canada and conducts Conferences throughout the United States and Canada.

If you have specific questions about this year’s Conference at Louhelen, contact BNASAA at bnasaa@sympatico.ca or 905-889-8168.

I’ve been going to these conferences since the very second one, and am soooo greatful that such a “safe haven” exists inside the Baha’i community, for discussing these sensitive topics. I’ve learned to reclaim my nobility by being there.

Have you ever been to a BNASAA conference?  Post your comment here: